EDUCATION AS IT OUGHT TO BE
It may seem paradoxical but, nevertheless, the Education of a child ought to begin before its birth.
In sober truth, if a woman, a few weeks after conception, makes a mental picture of the sex of the child she is going to bring forth into the world, of the physical and moral qualities with which she desires to see it endowed and if she will continue during the time of gestation to impress on herself the same mental image, the child will have the sex and qualities desired.
Spartan women only brought forth robust children, who grew to be redoubtable warriors, because their strongest desire was to give such heroes to their country; whilst, at Athens, mothers had intellectual children whose mental qualities were a hundredfold greater than their physical attributes.
The child thus engendered will be apt to accept readily good suggestions which may be made to him and to transform them into autosuggestion which later, will influence the course of his life. For you must know that all our words, all our acts, are only the result of autosuggestions caused, for the most part, by the suggestion of example or speech.
How then should parents, and those entrusted with the education of children avoid provoking bad autosuggestions and, on the other hand, influence good autosuggestions?
In dealing with children, always be even-tempered and speak in a gentle but firm tone. In this way they will become obedient without ever having the slightest desire to resist authority.
Above all–above all, avoid harshness and brutality, for there the risk is incurred of influencing an autosuggestion of cruelty accompanied by hate.
Moreover, avoid carefully, in their presence, saying evil of anyone, as too often happens, when, without any deliberate intention, the absent nurse is picked to pieces in the drawing-room.
Inevitably this fatal example will be followed, and may produce later a real catastrophe.
Awaken in them a desire to know the reason of things and a love of Nature, and endeavor to interest them by giving all possible explanations very clearly, in a cheerful, good-tempered tone. You must answer their questions pleasantly, instead of checking them with–"What a bother you are, do be quiet, you will learn that later."
Never on any account say to a child, "You are lazy and good for nothing" because that gives birth in him to the very faults of which you accuse him.
If a child is lazy and does his tasks badly, you should say to him one day, even if it is not true, "There this time your work is much better than it generally is. Well done". The child, flattered by the unaccustomed commendation, will certainly work better the next time, and, little by little, thanks to judicious encouragement, will succeed in becoming a real worker.
At all costs avoid speaking of illness before children, as it will certainly create in them bad autosuggestions. Teach them, on the contrary, that health is the normal state of man, and that sickness is an anomaly, a sort of backsliding which may be avoided by living in a temperate, regular way.
Do not create defects in them by teaching them to fear this or that, cold or heat, rain or wind, etc. Man is created to endure such variations without injury and should do so without grumbling.
Do not make the child nervous by filling his mind with stories of hob-goblins and were-wolves, for there is always the risk that timidity contracted in childhood will persist later.
It is necessary that those who do not bring up then children themselves should choose carefully those to whom they are entrusted. To love them is not sufficient, they must have the qualities you desire your children to possess.
Awaken in them the love of work and of study, making it easier by explaining things carefully and in a pleasant fashion, and by introducing in the explanation some anecdote which will make the child eager for the following lesson.
Above all impress on them that Work is essential for man, and that he who does not work in some fashion or another, is a worthless, useless creature, and that all work produces in the man who engages in it a healthy and profound satisfaction; whilst idleness, so longed for and desired by some, produces weariness, neurasthenia, disgust of life, and leads those who do not possess the means of satisfying the passions created by idleness, to debauchery and even to crime.
Teach children to be always polite and kind to all, and particularly to those whom the chance of birth has placed in a lower class than their own, and also to respect age, and never to mock at the physical or moral defects that age often produces.
Teach them to love all mankind, without distinction of caste. That one must always be ready to succor those who are in need of help, and that one must never be afraid of spending time and money for those who are in need; in short, that they must think more of others than of themselves.
In so doing an inner satisfaction is experienced that the egoist ever seeks and never finds.
Develop in them self-confidence, and teach that, before embarking upon any undertaking, it should be submitted to the control of reason, thus avoiding acting impulsively, and, after having reasoned the matter out, one should form a decision by which one abides, unless, indeed, some fresh fact proves you may have been mistaken.
Teach them above all that every one must set out in life with a very definite idea that he will succeed, and that, under the influence of this idea he will inevitably succeed. Not indeed, that he should quietly remain expecting events to happen, but because, impelled by this idea, he will do what is necessary to make it come true.
He will know how to take advantage of opportunities, or even perhaps of the single opportunity which may present itself, it may be only a single thread or hair, whilst he who distrusts himself is a Constant Guignard with whom nothing succeeds, because his efforts are all directed to that end.
Such a one may indeed swim in an ocean of opportunities, provided with heads of hair like Absalom himself, and he will be unable to seize a single hair, and often determines himself the causes which make him fail; whilst he, who has the idea of success in himself, often gives birth, in an unconscious fashion, to the very circumstances which produce that same success.
But above all, let parents and masters preach by example. A child is extremely suggestive, let something turn up that he wishes to do, and he does it.
As soon as children can speak, make them repeat morning and evening, twenty times consecutively:
"Day by day, in all respects, I grow better", which will produce in them an excellent physical, moral and healthy atmosphere.
If you make the following suggestion you will help the child enormously to eliminate his faults, and to awaken in him the corresponding desirable qualities.
Every night when the child is asleep, approach quietly, so as not to awaken him, to within about three or four feet from his bed. Stand there, murmuring in a low monotonous voice the thing or things you wish him to do.
Finally, it is desirable that all teachers should, every morning, make suggestions to their pupils, somewhat in the following fashion.
Telling them to shut their eyes, they should say: "Children, I expect you always to be polite and kind to everyone, obedient to your parents and teachers, when they give you an order, or tell you anything; you will always listen to the order given or the fact told without thinking it tiresome; you used to think it tiresome when you were reminded of anything, but now you understand very well that it is for your good that you are told things, and consequently, instead of being cross with those who speak to you, you will now be grateful to them.
"Moreover you will now love your work, whatever it may be; in your lessons you will always enjoy those things you may have to learn, especially whatever you may not till now have cared for.
"Moreover when the teacher is giving a lesson in class, you will now devote all your attention, solely and entirely to what he says, instead of attending to any silly things said or done by your companions, and without doing or saying anything silly yourself.
"Under these conditions as you are all intelligent, for, children, you are all intelligent, you will understand easily and remember easily what you have learned. It will remain embedded in your memory, ready to be at your service, and you will be able to make use of it as soon as you need it.
"In the same way when you are working at your lessons alone, or at home, when you are accomplishing a task or studying a lesson, you will fix your attention solely on the work you are doing, and you will always obtain good marks for your lessons."
This is the Counsel, which, if followed faithfully and truly from henceforth, will produce a race endowed with the highest physical and moral qualities.
Emile Coué.
A SURVEY OF THE "SÉANCES" AT M. COUÉ'S
The town thrills at this name, for from every rank of society people come to him and everyone is welcomed with the same benevolence, which already goes for a good deal. But what is extremely poignant is at the end of the séance to see the people who came in gloomy, bent, almost hostile (they were in pain), go away like everybody else; unconstrained, cheerful, sometimes radiant (they are no longer in pain!!). With a strong and smiling goodness of which he has the secret, M. Coué, as it were, holds the hearts of those who consult him in his hand; he addresses himself in turn to the numerous persons who come to consult him, and speaks to them in these terms:
"Well, Madame, and what is your trouble? . . ."
Oh, you are looking for two many whys and wherefores; what does the cause of your pain matter to you? You are in pain, that is enough . . . I will teach you to get rid of that. . . .
––
And you, Monsieur, your varicose ulcer is already better. That is good, very good indeed, do you know, considering you have only been here twice; I congratulate you on the result you have obtained. If you go on doing your autosuggestions properly, you will very soon be cured. . . . You have had this ulcer for ten years, you say? What does that matter? You might have had it twenty and more, and it could be cured just the same.
––
And you say that you have not obtained any improvement? . . . Do you know why? . . . Simply because you lack confidence in yourself. When I tell you that you are better, you feel better at once, don't you? Why? Because you have faith in me. Just believe in yourself and you will obtain the same result.
––
Oh, Madame not so many details, I beg you! By looking out for the details you create them, and you would want a list a yard long to contain all your maladies. As a matter of fact, with you it is the mental outlook which is wrong. Well, make up your mind that it is going to get better and it will be so. It's as simple as the Gospel. . . .
––
You tell me you have attacks of nerves every week. . . . Well, from to-day you are going to do what I tell you and you will cease to have them. . . .
––
You have suffered from constipation for a long time? . . . What does it matter how long it is? . . . You say it is forty years? Yes, I heard what you said, but it is none the less true that you can be cured to-morrow; you hear, to-morrow, on condition, naturally, of your doing exactly what I tell you to do, in the way I tell you to do it. . . .
––
Ah! you have glaucoma, Madame. I cannot absolutely promise to cure you of that, for I am not sure that I can. That does not mean that you cannot be cured, for I have known it to happen in the case of a lady of Chalon-sur-Saône and another of Lorraine.
Well, Mademoiselle, as you have not had your nervous attacks since you came here, whereas you used to have them every day, you are cured. Come back sometimes all the same, so that I may keep you going along the right lines.
––
The feeling of oppression will disappear with the lesions which will disappear when you assimilate properly; that will come all in good time, but you mustn't put the cart before the horse . . . it is the same with oppression as with heart trouble, it generally diminishes very quickly. . . .
––
Suggestion does not prevent you from going on with your usual treatment. . . . As for the blemish you have on your eye, and which is lessening almost daily, the opacity and the size are both growing less every day.
––
To a child (in a clear and commanding voice): "Shut your eyes, I am not going to talk to you about lesions or anything else, you would not understand; the pain in your chest is going away, and you won't want to cough any more."
––
Observation.–It is curious to notice that all those suffering from chronic bronchitis are immediately relieved and their morbid symptoms rapidly disappear. . . . Children, are very easy and very obedient subjects; their organism almost always obeys immediately to suggestion.
––
To a person who complains of fatigue: Well, so do I. There are also days when it tires me to receive people, but I receive them all the same and all day long. Do not say: "I cannot help it." "One can always overcome oneself."
Observation.–The idea of fatigue necessarily brings fatigue, and the idea that we have a duty to accomplish always gives us the necessary strength to fulfill it. The mind can and must remain master of the animal side of our nature.
––
The cause which prevents you from walking, whatever it is, is going to disappear little by little every day: you know the proverb: Heaven helps those who help themselves. Stand up two or three times a day supporting yourself on two persons, and say to yourself firmly: My kidneys are not so weak that I cannot do it, on the contrary I can. . . .
––
After having said: "Every day, in every respect, I am getting better and better," add: "The people who are pursuing me cannot pursue me any more, they are not pursuing me. . . ."
––
What I told you is quite true; it was enough to think that you had no more pain for the pain to disappear; do not think then that it may come back or it will come back. . . .
(A woman, sotto voice, "What patience he has! What a wonderfully painstaking man!")
––
ALL THAT WE THINK BECOMES TRUE FOR US. WE MUST NOT THEN ALLOW OURSELVES TO THINK WRONGLY.
––
THINK "MY TROUBLE IS GOING AWAY," JUST AS YOU THINK YOU CANNOT OPEN YOUR HANDS.
The more you say: "I will not," the more surely the contrary comes about. You must say: "It's going away," and think it. Close your hand and think properly: "Now I cannot open it." Try! (she cannot), you see that your will is not much good to you.
Observation.–This is the essential point of the method. In order to make auto-suggestions, you must eliminate the will completely and only address yourself to the imagination, so as to avoid a conflict between them in which the will would be vanquished.
––
To become stronger as one becomes older seems paradoxical, but it is true.
––
For diabetes: Continue to use therapeutic treatments; I am quite willing to make suggestions to you, but I cannot promise to cure you.
Observation.--I have seen diabetes completely cured several times, and what is still more extraordinary, the albumen diminish and even disappear from the urine of certain patients.
––
This obsession must be a real nightmare. The people you used to detest are becoming your friends, you like them and they like you.
Ah, but to will and to desire is not the same thing.
––
Then, after having asked them to close their eyes, M. Coué gives to his patients the little suggestive discourse which is to be found in "Self Mastery." When this is over, he again addresses himself to each one separately, saying to each a few words on his case:
To the first: "You, Monsieur, are in pain, but I tell you that, from to-day, the cause of this pain whether it is called arthritis or anything else, is going to disappear with the help of your unconscious, and the cause having disappeared, the pain will gradually become less and less, and in a short time it will be nothing but a moment."
To the second person: "Your stomach does not function properly, it is more or less dilated. Well, as I told you just now, your digestive functions are going to work better and better, and I add that the dilatation of the stomach is going to disappear little by little. Your organism is going to give back progressively to your stomach the force and elasticity it had lost, and by degrees as this phenomenon is produced, the stomach will return to its primitive form and will carry out more and more easily the necessary movements to pass into the intestine the nourishment it contains. At the same time the pouch formed by the relaxed stomach will diminish in size, the nutriment will not longer stagnate in this pouch, and in consequence the fermentation set up will end by totally disappearing."
To the third: "To you, Mademoiselle, I say that whatever lesions you may have in your liver, your organism is doing what is necessary to make the lesions disappear every day, and by degrees as they heal over, the symptoms from which you suffer will go on lessening and disappearing. Your liver then functions in a more and more normal way, the bile it secretes is alcaline and no longer acid, in the right quantity and quality, so that it passes naturally into the intestines and helps intestinal digestion."
To the fourth: "My child, you hear what I say; every time you feel you are going to have an attack, you will hear my voice telling you as quick as lightning: 'No, no! my friend, you are not going to have that attack, and it is going to disappear before it comes. . . .'"
To the fifth, etc., etc.
When everyone has been attended to, M. Coué tells those present to open their eyes, and adds: "You have heard the advice I have just given you. Well, to transform it into reality, what you must do is this: As long as you live, every morning before getting up, and every evening as soon as you are in bed, you must shut your eyes, so as to concentrate your attention, and repeat twenty times following, moving your lips (that is indispensable) and counting mechanically on a string with twenty knots in it the following phrase: 'Every day, in every respect, I am getting better and better.'"
There is no need to think of anything in particular, as the words "in every respect" apply to everything. This autosuggestion must be made with confidence, with faith, with the certainty of obtaining what is desired. The greater the conviction of the person, the greater and the more rapid will be the results obtained.
Further, every time that in the course of the day or night you feel any physical or mental discomfort, affirm to yourself that you will not consciously contribute to it, and that you are going to make it vanish; then isolate yourself as much as possible, and passing your hand over your forehead if it is something mental, or on whatever part that is painful if it is something physical, repeat very quickly, moving the lips, the words: "It is going, it is going . . ., etc., etc." as long as it is necessary. With a little practice, the mental or physical discomfort will disappear in about 20 to 25 seconds. Begin again every time it is necessary.
For this as for the other autosuggestions it is necessary to act with the same confidence, the same conviction, the same faith, and above all without effort.
M. Coué also adds what follows: "If you formerly allowed yourself to make bad autosuggestions because you did it unconsciously, now that you know what I have just taught you, you must no longer let this happen. And if, in spite of all, you still do it, you must only accuse yourself, and say 'Mea culpa, mea maxima culpa.'"
And now, if a grateful admirer of the work and of the founder of the method may be allowed to say a few words, I will say. "Monsieur Coué shows us luminously that the power to get health and happiness is within us: we have indeed received this gift."
Therefore, suppressing, first of all, every cause of suffering created or encouraged by ourselves, then putting into practice the favorite maxim of Socrates: "Know thyself," and the advice of Pope: "That I may reject none of the benefits that Thy goodness bestows upon me," let us take possession of the entire benefit of autosuggestion, let us become this very day members of the "Lorraine Society of applied Psychology;" let us make members of it those who may be in our care (it is a good deed to do to them).
By this means we shall follow first of all the great movement of the future of which M. E. Coué is the originator (he devotes to it his days, his nights, his worldly goods, and refuses to accept . . . but hush; no more of this! lest his modesty refuses to allow these lines to be published without alteration), but above all by this means we shall know exactly the days and hours of his lectures at Paris, Nancy and other towns, where he devotedly goes to sow the good seed, and where we can go too to see him, and hear him and consult him personally, and with his help awake or stir up in ourselves the personal power that everyone of us has received of becoming happy and well.
May I be allowed to add that when M. Coué has charged an entrance fee for his lectures, they have brought in thousands of francs for the Disabled and others who have suffered through the war.
E. Vs–oer.
Note.--Entrance is free to the members of the Lorraine Society of applied Psychology.
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